wife wants to be a truck driver

[waynew1]

my wife is leaving sun for truck driver training. after training she will be team driving with my step daughter.
needless to say i am not happy with this decision and i have made my feelings known to her that i dont like it one bit!

she is very strong willed and thinks this will work out for us.
i think this will pull us apart. i am a firm believer in, absence makes the heart grow fonder of someone else.

the way it looks, if were lucky. we will see each other 1 wknd a month. this is not what i want out of my marrage, a part time wife.

any advice would be appreicated. wayne

[Alec]

I'm sorry you're going through this.

I agree that occupations that keep one of the spouses away from home for long periods of time are not good for marriage. You might see if she'd be willing to go see a marriage counselor. A marriage counselor would be an objective third party.

I can think of two reasons why someone would want to start a career like that, but there are probably lots of others. She might be blinded by the income potential, or there might already be real problems in your marriage that she doesn't know how to deal with. A marriage counselor could help sort out either.

I don't think it's good to think in terms of "absence makes the heart grow fonder of someone else." That's not good for your marriage either. Your wife's absence doesn't excuse any behavior on your part. I especially wouldn't say that out loud.

[waynew1]

i did mention the fact that we should seek council and she doesnt want to go. she is the type that ,if we polled 100 people as to their opinion of our situation and they agreed with me,it wouldnt matter what they think. they are wrong!
i'm not worried about my behavior, yet. but u never know what could happen during a lonely moment. the flesh can be very weak. u shouldnt put yourself or your marrage in that position. in my mind that is exactly what she is doing, putting our marrage at risk.

[theyeti]

:(

Here's the classic advice column advice, which I think applies here well: If she won't go to a counselor with you, go without her.

Of course, it might be something a counselor can fix, it might have nothing to do with your marriage and everything to do with her alone. But it can't hurt.
How long have you been married, and have their been problems before? It seems strange to me that she would want to do this, but like what has already been said... there could be many, many reasons.

You've got to get to the bottom of why she wants to do this all of a sudden - spend time w/ the step daughter? See the country? Appease her free spirit? Once you've done this, you can start to try and work something out, hopefully... if nothing else, is it possible for her to work less? 6 months of the year maybe? Only 2 or 3 weeks a month?
A marriage that lasts just one weekend a month isn't what a marriage should be, and like you said, it certainly isn't what you signed up for.

It looks like this is a rea

[jamesglewisf]

I'm going with theyeti. If she won't go to a counselor, go by yourself. I'd go to one that believes in the sanctity of marriage, who only believes in Biblical divorce.

I'd ask your minister to recommend a good Christian counselor.