How Do You Fight Fairly

[Justawoman]

The comedienne, Phyllis Diller, once said, "Don't go to bed mad, stay up and fight!" Well, that's not the best advice, but it beats doing the "I’ll - pretend - to sleep - but - what - I’ll - really - do - is - toss - and - turn - groan - and - moan - and - make - you - as - miserable - as - I - am routine." Whether you stay up all night fighting or tossing and turning, one thing is certain, you’ll be exhausted and miserable and your problem won’t go away.
http://www.wholefamily.com


I guess this was on my mind because DH and I got into it last night. No marriage or relationship goes without some conflict. So how do you all handle conflicts with your significant other? Here are some things I try to adhere too:
No yelling
No digging up the past
No talking down too
No interrupting

[pack momma]

we carry on until one of us shoots the other the "bird" or does something totally outrageous and we both end up laughing at our childishness, then we can talk like rational adults. I can't say we have ever really had a fight in almost 24 years. We disagree from time to time but it never really heats up much before it gets silly. I am the one who tends to be the hothead. when I do my hubby refers to my Indian heritage, watered down as it is, by calling me "Flying Hatchet". That usually is enough to make me catch myself and when its him acting up I just tell him to stop acting like an AH. One of those in the family is enough (the bil)

[raybeck]

Geeesh, JAW, you just took all the fun things out of fighting if I go by your list!!! lol Just kiddin! Good advice, actually...

[Justawoman]

Well Beck if I had made that list about 8 years ago it would have been different. We use to have turbulent fights and they got nasty. We both decided it was time to grow up. I just can't cotton being yelled at or talked down too and I don't like doing it to him anymore. Now we settle our differences and we both sleep better.

[Noseypoo]

My Mom always said: "Never go to bed mad" ... It does work {thumbsu}

[raybeck]

Hey, I agree with you guys completely!!! My DH does not like to argue, so he will just get quiet. I'm happy to say most of our fighting days were when we were much younger, I guess with age you really do get wiser!!!

[Justawoman]

Maybe we just learn to pick our battles more carefully.

[raybeck]

That's true, JAW, and maybe we learn what is really important and what isn't!

[crazybuoy]

just battle carefully.