Forgivness

[Sin Eater]

Hi
Why do people find it hard to forgive.

[Grimey]

Why do you act like it is such a surprise? We find it hard to forgive because we none of us are perfect. If we were perfect, we would be willing to forgive. If we were perfect, there would be nothing to forgive.

[Justawoman]

I don't think it forgiveness that is hard, it is forgetting when someone hurts you.

[Sin Eater]

Why do you act like it is such a surprise? We find it hard to forgive because we none of us are perfect. If we were perfect, we would be willing to forgive. If we were perfect, there would be nothing to forgive.
Hi
I guess all this forgivness has to start somewhere.

[Dude111]

Well just an example:

If cheating is the reason,thats very hard to forgive cause you cant ever trust them again......

[pack momma]

depends on what you are being asked or expected to forgive. Some things are easier than others, Did you have something specific in mind, Sin Eater?
There are sins against us, and then there are willfull wrongs.

[MarriedforLife]

Forgiveness is hard because of the mess of feelings that we experience, anger, hurt, hate. The feelings stop us from deciding to forgive even if we want to forgive the person that hurt us. Often, I have found, that just deciding to forgive is the biggest and most important step to take. Do this even when you don't feel like forgiving and you will find that eventually the feeling will follow. Ask God to help you to forgive, that is His heart and He will help you.

Regarding the trust issue, well it is possible to trust again even after infidelity - but it is hard. The first step is again forgiveness. Then it takes lots of work and the person who don't trust needs to want to get to the place where they are trusted by you and be willing to put things in place in their lifestyle to start building trust. For example in the case of infidelity letting the spouse that was cheated against phone them whenever thoughts of insecurity rise up, allowing your spouse to come along with you whenever he or she is wondering exactly where you are going and is it for a secret rendevous.

This was meant to be a quick answer, sorry. We can talk more about this if you want?

[Emina]

Forgiveness is hard because still have love, if there is no love there is no forgiveness.

[Dude111]

Yes thats true my friend!!

So many have forgotton how to love!!

[Sophialiu]

Everything can be fade from one's memory, just need more time.

[Dude111]

Not if it was IMPORTANT to them they dont ever forget it :(

[xspinningisfun]

Forgiveness has been really hard on me. I was physically and sexually abused growing up. Getting punched in the face by my OWN father and receiving bloody noses and bruises for YEARS made me despise my own flesh and blood. I hated my Dad. There was a time where I literally wanted to KILL him. CPS failed me; therapists failed me; my own family failed me.

You can tell me forgiveness is easy. But if you think that way, then you haven't been through much trauma. And I praise God you didn't. But once you go through something traumatic like what I went through, forgiveness is hard.

Last time my Dad put his hands on me was 2 years ago. It was winter time....and I got out of that house FAST. And I was obviously blamed (I've been blamed for my Dad's actions. The abuse was swept under the rug and it STILL IS under the rug.). Anyways, last time my dad put my hands on me, i ran out of the house to get out of there and I had no shoes, no coat. In 20 degrees weather.

It wasn't until recent that I let God finally heal me. I have layers and layers and LAYERS of hurt. But God took away the layer of bitterness, he took away the layer of PTSD. He's still working on me. I have hurt, and I still have a bit of anger in me. But anger no longer consumes me like it used to.

I'm trying to learn to love my earthly Dad like my God does. My Jesus loves my Dad. And as much as I hate saying that, God does.

[Dude111]

Ahhhhhhhhhhh im so sorry :(

Im glad you made it thru that and are here with us now :)

Peace and love to you my friend http://img138.imageshack.us/img138/435/grouphugym7.gif

[xspinningisfun]

Ahhhhhhhhhhh im so sorry :(

Im glad you made it thru that and are here with us now :)

Peace and love to you my friend http://img138.imageshack.us/img138/435/grouphugym7.gif

Yes, God is good. :)
He really does indeed love me. <3

[yellowbelly]

It is hard to forgive because you can see that they might do the same thing again to you in the future.

[xspinningisfun]

It is hard to forgive because you can see that they might do the same thing again to you in the future.
Exactly. That's why we must ask for God to give us the forgiveness and the love that God gives to US. Because God loves the one that has hurt us...and he's forgiven them (if they've actually stopped doing what they were doing and actually repented. My Dad didn't repent until 6-8 years of the abuse. I know God's forgiven him now, because my Dad hasn't laid his hands on me in like 2 years!)

[PopCulture]

People find it hard to forgive because they find it hard to be loved and they find it hard to love. No love. No forgiveness.

[Dude111]

Thats quite true!

[Dude111]

Yes foregiveness IS QUITE HARD!!!!!!

Welcome ashore mate :)